I am a super French art nerd. I have Chagall on my bedroom door, I made my students research a French artist when I was a high school teacher, I have eaten at the cafe that Van Gogh painted in Cafe Du Nuit. If you travel with me, we are going to the art museum, the big one and the little ones. I can tell you in which crappy little studio Cubism was invented, which train station in Paris inspired Monet with it’s steamy environment, which Impressionist was a momma’s boy, which floor in the Musee d’Orsay you should hit first, and all about the students who died in the streets of Paris for the right to artistic nudity back in the day. I will shut up now.

So predictably I was very excited to visit the new exhibit at the Seattle Art Museum, Inspiring Impressionism, which promises to highlight the roots of the Avant-garde artistic movement as the school of painters evolved from being laughed off the streets of Paris in the 1860’s to today’s current insanely popular status of the genre: come on, even your grandma has a picture of Monet’s waterlillies. 

Back in the day, however, the tawdry gang of Bazille, Monet, Manet, Morisot, Cassatt, Degas, Renoir, Pissarro, and Sisley were freaking rock stars; rebels in the structured French art world who painted what no one dared paint before. They painted scenes of daily life, not posing nobles. They worked spontaneously outside, not in the studio with a plan. They emphasized light over darkness, shunning the color black. They used bright, unmixed color with bold brush strokes, eschewing the traditional goal of trying to achieve reality with their pictures. They favored generalized form over specific detail and focused on the setting of the painting, not the subject. The Impressionists represented a complete break from the the progression of the history of art.

Or did they? The current exhibit at the Seattle Art Museum explores this idea to illuminate the true origins of the Impressionist movement. Inspiring Impressionism looks not at the painters’ childhoods or where they spent their adolescence, but rather it reveals what artists inspired the new school of the Impressionists. And Impressionism is there, lurking in 18th century paintings of the Dutch Masters and peeking out from the walls of the Louvre. You can see the seeds of this revolutionary Impressionist movement beginning to sprout long before Manet painted a naked lady on the grass and scandalized the masses (Le Déjeuner sur l’Herbe, 1863).

Monet may have stated that he was “never influenced by the art of the past”, but that is just the ego of an artist talking. Of course all of the Impressionists were influenced by the works of Michaelangelo, by unearthed Greek Kouros statues, of Spanish works brought to France after Napoleon’s invasion of the Iberian Peninsula. You have been influenced by this art as well, whether you know it or not. Art effects culture which effects identity and that’s you. The Impressionists as well were not isolated from the history of art culture; rather they took their inspiration from it.

Many of the group studied classical paintings in the Louvre; Manet and Degas met there while copying Spanish artist Velasquez’ Infanta Margarita (1656). Some attended the hoity-toity Ecole des Beaux-Arts (School of Fine Arts) on the Left Bank which still churns out annoying art students today. Living in Paris it is impossible not to be inspired by the art of the past; the city is saturated in beauty and art that soon gets inside of you. This was just as true in the 1860’s when the Impressionists were coming of age. The evolution of art is a continual process, a connected and holistic animal whose parts cannot be severed. The exhibit plays this out beautifully, with an easy and compelling story-line along with additional artist info at particular paintings from your cell phone if you so desire. 

The absolute most amazing room of the exhibition is the last one, a small space hung with four paintings from some of the top-name Impressionists: Monet, Manet, Renoir, and Cezanne. The works continue the story of art in your mind and show you without a doubt that the circle of inspiration is still rolling. From Cezanne’s Mont Sainte-Victoire (1906), Cubism jumps out and punches you in the face. Renoir’s The Wave (1882) leans fully into abstraction with red and golden pieces of water swirling up into the sky, as does a close-up of Monet’s Waterlillies which seem to be floating not in his tranquil garden in Giverny, but somewhere in the ethereal consciousness of a flower fairy. Manet’s Gypsy Woman with a Cigarette intensely blends his earlier romantic world view with a forward-looking modernist approach. These four paintings do a brilliant job of showcasing the continual evolution of arts culture, a powerful ending point to the well laid-out exhibit that truly drives the point home. We are all connected; we are inspired by and inspire our fellow human beings. At least that is what we are going for.

This point was made even clearer to me while I was thinking about the exhibit as I was dancing Thursday night at Club Pop at Chop Suey. For the first time in my life, I truly appreciated the decade I was born in: the 70’s. Say what you want about white polyester jump suits, feathered hair, and All in the Family, but the disco movement completely paved the way for the electronic music and hip-hop of today that I love so much. You can hear it in the beats, just as you can see the beginnings of Impressionism decades before the movement had a name. And disco in turn was influenced by Latin rhythms like the Samba, which was itself inspired by beats from the African Congo…it is this continuous flow of ideas which create and evolve not only the arts but human culture in general. We cannot escape the past, nor should we want to; it is a fundamental part of our identity. And besides, I really like disco balls.

Good art makes you think. Great art changes the way you see the world. Inspiring Impressionism makes a profound statement not only about the world of the French Impressionists, but on the connected nature of human existence, which is so important at a time when we must work together to ensure our species’ survival. No human is an island, not even Monet.

Inspiring Impressionism runs at the Seattle Art Museum through September 21; tickets are $20 and there are special discounts for students and seniors. It is highly recommended; even super French art nerds can learn a thing or two. 

The 3rd Annual Seattle Power Tool Race & Derby 2008 took place on Saturday (6-28). The event was part of Artopia in Georgetown. HazardFactory hosted the event. Their claim of faster tools, bigger air, more chaos, and more stupid (huh) turned out to be true. Check out the smashing and crashing that went down.

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Culturemob was proud to be a co-sponsor of the event!

Go to culturemob to discover more events.

Two hours east of Seattle this weekend a mountain of energy was created deep in the woods, far away from civilization, far away from everything except what really matters. Photosynthesis 1.0, presented by Collective Flow, brought together old friends and new, a stupid number of local DJs that we all know and love, along with a copious amount of hula-hooping, fire-twirling, bubbles in the breeze, giggling children, hours and hours of music and dancing, silly dogs, a deep indigo sky bursting with stars and framed by evergreens, legions of mimosas, body paint galore, and a naked guy. Now this was a party. Up on top of the ridge it was sunny and warm in the day, windy and cold as hell at night. I arrived in a sheer sundress and hours later had on not one but two pair of wool socks, June be damned, living the wisdom that there is no bad weather, only inappropriate clothing. Good thing I brought some.

Beats, beeps, scratches, and whomps found a temporary home in the forest and were sent out into the trees from three stages. The combination of the great outdoors and electronic music generates an incredible sense of enchantment; what should be an odd match of opposites instead creates an all-encompassing feeling of happiness, of wholeness, of everything being right in the world. I pitched my tent by the Main Stage, the Nama Stage, which gave me easy access to the art dome, the big heart-shaped campfire, and to the festival kitchen to whom I must give mad, mad props. A huge amount of time and effort went into the food preparation; nobody at the festival went hungry because heaps of people worked very hard to make sure of it. Every time I passed by the kitchen there was a flipping buffet of healthy food, made with love. Pho the first night, then veggie gumbo, a van-load of tamales, A ROAST PIG, fresh fruit, homemade breakfast muffins; everything I tried was absolutely fantastic. Mad, mad, props to the Sweet Peeps kitchen for their hard work and delicious chow.

The Main Stage rocked consistently for two nights with sick DJs from all over the Pacific Northwest. Novatron laid it down in the middle of the dance floor, his dog Ziggy running around like an idiot and the rest of us shaking our souls and asses for the artist. I never ever miss one of Novatron’s live sets, he is a master. My favorite player of the festival though (do I have to say it?) was the brilliantly original Noisemaker who played two random time slots around 5AM and 5PM. Come on now yall, this DJ belongs in the middle of the fire and frenzy and madness of the night. That is his home. Noisemaker had the freshest and most unique sets of the party; I really loved watching people stroll up who had never before heard his brand of crunk. They first look a little confused by the frog noises and Big Band music, then they start smiling, and then they start dancing. Curious DJs wandered up to check out his set as well, and one of my friends laid out the reason he loves Noisemaker: “It’s just like, ‘I’m Noisemaker. I’ll do what I want. I spin Britney Spears, bitch, and you’re gonna love it and you’re going to dance.” And dance we did.

The second stage out in the woods was Vex Village, where I spent the least amount of time, though I did catch the unbelievable KJ Sawka set on Friday night; could he possibly be a more bad-ass drummer? No. He couldn’t. And do the ladies love him or what! “Blah blah blah I love Kevin Sawka” is all I heard that night. I was also lucky to catch Von Dewey on the second stage as well who laid down quite a fat set of beats for the crowd.

The three stages were a nice walk apart from each other, but traveling the cold path between them birthed ample opportunities for random social encounters. I love being a nomad, wondering around in the dark woods by myself (sorry Mom), meeting strangers and strange friends in the night. On the liminal path, that dirt space between worlds and stages and social circles, anything can happen- there are no rules.

My favorite home of Photosynthesis 1.0 was the rock-strewn dance floor of the third stage, the Orca Sound Lab. When I came upon the area the first evening, it was nothing but three speakers on the grass by some trees. The following day however the wooded area was transformed into a sacred circle of dance. The beats started out strong there Saturday afternoon with Awggie and the Mendicants, and then HOLY FREAKING TECHNO! Can I say it again? HOLY FREAKING TECHNO.

What had been just three speakers in the forest became a temple of unrelenting beats that continued deep and deeper into the night as one DJ after another ripped it in half, a blazing lineup that spiraled through the forest into a incessant explosion, a rampage, a frenzy. The stage was on fire the whole night; this is the reason I don’t mention any of the headliners of the festival in my review. I was possessed by the techno. Nordic Soul ignited the madness with quite the ridiculous set; he cannot hide the fact that he thoroughly enjoys what he does to the dance floor as much as we do. I am in love with this DJ. The techno continued its unabated aural penetration as the evening continued; the one-hour sets went quickly and we were treated to a succession of gifted electronic artists. Manos was laying down straight crazy, dubby shit; Panty Control, Milkplant, Brian S., Jesse, and to all the DJs that night who I met and can’t remember your name, you guys destroyed us there in the middle of the forest. The sloped and rocky dance floor did not stop the party from giving it up to the Dance.

I danced in the forest all night and into the morning, not a creature of my own volition but a slave to the music. The beats go inside of my body and move it for me, I have no choice in the matter. The incongruent blend of electronic music and campfires puts something in your soul that cannot be explained, it can only be felt. And can I shout out to the DJs who dance? I absolutely love to see you guys on the floor getting down. I love it. I nourish myself with the symbiotic relationship between the DJ and the dancers and the energy it creates. Music changed my life, music saved my life, music is my life. There is no one in existence who can say that music has not contributed positively to their world, and most of you probably even agree with my three hippie-face declarations above.

However at any festival or party there always seems to be one DJ who completely destroys the dance floor and whose name is on everyone’s hungover lips the next morning around campfires and smoke circles. At Photosynthesis 1.0 it was Ctrl_Alt_Del. This boy absolutely rocked the minds and bodies of everyone who heard his set late Saturday night, his own as well if I am not mistaken. I don’t know crack about minimal techno, but my body does. I feel the energy trapped in the pulsing beats, the intense throbbing that stays just below the surface, rising and falling and threatening to bubble uncontrollably to the top of our minds. Ctrl_Alt_Del kept us on that threshold; speaking to our subconscious desires and the nethermost chasms of our very beings with the pulsing undercurrent. Techno rouses the ID, the animal inside of us all who just wants to grab the person dancing next to us and run off into the woods naked and screaming, social-circle cohesion be damned. Ctrl_Alt_Del woke up this beast on his dance floor, and short of going raving mad and frothing at the mouth and howling at the moon, we danced. We danced all night in the woods like our ancestors did for hundreds of thousands of years, warming ourselves with the fire and our feet.

Which, of course, is why we go to festivals; to dance on the earth with bare feet, to experience the feeling of walking up on a campfire encircled by strangers in the middle of the night, to see children playing free in the forest, to wear feathers in our hair, to walk paths drenched in falling light alone. Time returns to it’s true and undefined nature and exists only as a DJ lineup. For a few days, we commune with the earth and each other as humans have done long, long before the time of texting and Myspace and traffic. We share food, and water, and energy, and life. The weekend was almost perfect.

Sunday morning I woke up and found out that a boy had died. His name was Shawn-e. I met him the night before, he was fishing for ravers with a pole and a glow stick. He caught one; it was me. We said our hellos-my-name-is and went along our separate ways in the dark forest. I really wish I could leave this out, that I could skip this unpleasant part of my annoyingly positive review, that I could keep the weekend lingering in your minds as singularly and wickedly beautiful. But I can’t. That morning as I sat at a friend’s campsite with a circle of strangers sharing a bottle of warm Champagne, a sound met our ears, the echoes of a girl weeping in the woods. The small circle of humans froze. Our eyes locked; we were strangers bound together by the sound of the absolute despair of one of our own. Once again this weekend we were reminded that we are all connected. We all live together and we will all die.

But you are alive, right now, reading this. So guess what? You have to live for Shawn-e now. All of you. You have to dance a little harder, you have to sing a little louder, you have to live a little more. You have to devour every new experience that presents itself to you and is good. You have to suck out the marrow of life just a little more now, not just for Shawn-e but for all of your friends who drop away from this world. Add Shawn-e to the long list of reasons why you refuse to have anything but an absolutely incredible life, rich with experience and human connections. My heart aches for the friends and family who knew Shawn-e well; know that I met him but a few tiny moments on this earth and in that brief encounter, he made me smile and laugh.

The music was turned off, the campers slowly left, and the energy dissipated, carried away bit by bit in each of us to be dispersed around the Pacific Northwest. I packed up the car and went to pay my respects to the dance floors, finding once again that the third stage was just a few speakers sitting in the middle of the woods. The only evidence of the party mania and techno fever the night before was a charred campfire and grass stomped away by dancing feet. Ashes to ashes. I made a huge trash sweep over the forest campground and found only one gum wrapper on the grounds; this place had been well-loved and taken care of. I walked away from Photosynthesis 1.0 filled up, with renewed inspiration to live every single day as fully as I possibly can.

Heading home over a rock path with a few wrong turns and a late lunch at random cafe #3 in Cle Elum (complete with deer chandeliers and a bear skin rug on the wall), my carload was salivating for more electronic music. Seriously. Drool was dripping off our chins. Thankfully I had a downloaded CD of Ctrl_Alt_Del in my car- however it only plays when my navigator has not jammed a second disc into my car’s stereo system. Alas, for the two-hour ride home, we were stuck in radio hell, which is no mild exaggeration after a weekend of such mind-melting music; going back to Top 40 was pure aural torture. I have a bad habit of screaming at DJs to drop the beat when they hold out too long, which is what I was yelling at my radio by the time we reached North Bend. Jazzy-F Lips on KE-whatever didn’t seem to hear me, but somehow I made it back to my favorite home-of-the-moment, Seattle.

I am satiated with positive energy from this weekend. Thank you, thank you, thank you, to everyone who shared this time in the woods with me, every single one of you: the people who worked hard to give us a party, the new friends I made, the people whose names I’ve already forgotten, the ones of you I didn’t get to meet and the one of you who will not dance again. To the girl in the woods, I wept with you. Thank you for sharing your energy, all of you, and in exchange I give you my words and will share my filled-up spirit to everyone I meet.

Damn I sound like a hippie.

So what is this techno music I keep going on about? Pulsing? The ID? The undercurrents of penetrating electronic beats that moves your body and fills up your head and will not goes away? Find out this Tuesday at Vito’s when Oi Vay gets MADE: Struggle, DJ Eddie, and Jeromino will be spinning a lovely evening of techno in an Italian mobster cafe; come out and dance and live a bit more than your normal weekday night. Who knows? It just might change your life.

If you would like to comment on Photosynthesis 1.0, or my review, or on some of the amazing DJ sets I missed because there are not two of me, please comment below. I would love it.

Click here to read more of my show reviews; click here to read all of my random blog posts.

Note from Shilo, CultureMob’s Queen of Content:

CultureMob is now in sunny SAN DIEGO and has plans to open in Los Angeles, San Francisco, and Orange County by the end of June! In honor of our foray into sunny Southern California I have a special guest blogger, Thaïs, who just returned from kicking off festival season right at Lightning in a Bottle in Santa Barbara.

Do you like to write about arts and entertainment and want to be a guest blogger for CultureMob? Send me a message: shilo@culturemob.com

GUEST BLOGGER: Thaïs

The expedition started out on Wednesday, May 21 deep into the night. After rushing to get ready and loading up the van and trailer, we picked up our fellow copilots. We were now off to make a 24 hour drive, on our way to beautiful Santa Barbara to catch the breathtaking forest festival, Lightning in a Bottle!

Luckily for my boyfriend and I we were blessed with two angels that liked to drive and ended up doing so most of the way. Ah, what a lovely drive it was! With a bed in the back, and DJ Noisemaker pulling a 24 hour live set in the captain’s chair while we chain-smoked and cuddled, I couldn’t have asked for anything more!

After the long haul we made it to Lightning in a Bottle, where we met up with our wonderful camp GFP, Ghetto Fabulous Projects, Leaders of Random. And what a lovely bunch they are.

For three entire days we had the chance to stay at this divine location. Full of love, magik and sooo much more. Everywhere you turned a bright, enlightened spirit would be there warming your heart and filling your soul with ridiculous amounts of love. If I wouldn’t have known any better, seeing as I have been to quite a few festivals in my past, I would have swore I was in a Dream Land, on a magical adventure with fairies and dragons…oh my!

We had the chance to make it to all three stages, four if you want to count the Renegade Stage. Each one spiraled towards the sky with it’s own individuality. The Bamboo Stage, or Main Stage, was made of thousands of pieces of wood, woven together to make a star-like tetrahedron. What countless hours this must have taken, each piece individually strewn together! Next was the Wookie Stage…we didn’t get to make it to this one too much but it did consist of a large, shell-like DJ booth with a few other posts surrounding the area. And last but DEFINITELY not least was the Tree Stage. This was the stage that just seemed to be bumping at ALL hours of the night! It looked like a pirate ship with different rooms and levels…and what a fun stage to dance on! This was where most of the most rockin’ DJs played, jamming out in all hours of the night. David Starfire, Bassnectar, Glitch Mob, and so many others kicked our asses here. There wasn’t one moment that the dance floor wasn’t PACKED!

When we weren’t dancing our little butts off or conversing with tons of magik folk, there were booths to discover, such as Kelsey’s Creations with fairy-like tutus and Foxy’s Tooth Bling, where you could bling out your teeth with tiny sparkling jewels. And of course there were also live artists, fun air-brushing, and don’t forget the organic yummyness of food everywhere!

All I’ve got to say is thank you, Lightning in a Bottle for a most exciting, freakin’ fabulous, lusciously divine weekend! I’ll be seeing you at Lightning in a Bottle 2009- it only gets better from here!

I’m telling you, SEAllective at Lo-Fi was a great vibe last night. Every city has a place where the atmosphere is so cool, you can’t help but tell the world about it. Lo-Fi is the type of place you’ll want to bring your savvy friends who happen to be visiting from New York to. Then you can tell them “Seattle knows how to get down.”

I wrote a review of the performance (Fred Roth) here at http://culturemob.com/events/5579896

Outside of the great music, one of the coolest things I did last night was try the Lo-Fi’s own Sake Jello shot in a glass.

Wanna know something? It was really good! It was the right combination of Sake and Jello. Compliments to the owner. Nice touch!

Pictured here (from l-r) is Darrius Willrich, Donyea Goodman and Thaddeus Turner.

Three of the seven musicians that turned the heat up on the second set last night. I really dig what they got going on at the Lo-Fi these days. I love live music in Seattle!

For more events at Lo-Fi go to culturemob.com

You know Produkt. You might not know that you know Produkt, but you do. You have no doubt seen these cats on dance floors, behind decks, taking pictures, painting, drawing, and promoting the Seattle electronic music scene all over the city, night after night, club after club.

Humans don’t fit into one category, as easy as that might be for us, and this is why the diverse artistry which Produkt provides and CultureMob.com are such a beautiful match. We all have many interests. I love electronic music, which is why I check NWTekno about a thousand times a day. However, I also really like horror movies, sketch comedy, reggae, festivals, sculpture exhibits, and swing dancing- and this is where CultureMob comes in. We cover the whole spectrum of entertainment and recognize that everyone has multiple interests in the arts and wants to discover local events without going to twenty different websites.

Produkt realizes this too, which is why at an event like the upcoming Gruvsessionz at Heavens Nightclub you will find not only skilled DJs spinning a variety of beats from house to techno to drum and bass to glitch, but also local visual artists doing their thing live, go-go dancers who truly love to dance (and just happen to be total hotties), and photographers documenting the good times (just in case anyone’s memory is a little fuzzy).

I support Produkt for one reason which is really two: PRODUKT GETS DOWN. Known as the “dopest crew in town,” the Produkt peeps are all about having fun and living it up; however they also take care of their business, heavily promoting each other as well as local artists from outside the group. Produkt stays engaged with the Seattle scene, organizing new events and injecting electricity into the nightlife of the city, which all too often suffers from a hipster-ethos, an I’m-too-cool-to-care vibe. I always hear people whining about how hard it is to make friends in Seattle, and that no one dances in this town. Those people obviously have never been to a Produkt show.

Even the group’s name connotes this passionate response to artistic expression. Just as Produkt provides new experiences for Seattle, they too are a Produkt of the music they deliver. With all of the art happening all around, how could you NOT become excited and go out and dance and have fun? As much as humans create art, it creates us too. Come to a Produkt event and you will find a dance floor full of smiling faces rocking out. And did I mention the hotties?

Produkt has already proved successful with the ongoing series of Analog nights which occur the last Friday of every month at Rebar; next up is the May 30th Analog IX: I Like Orange and Techno. Their newest conquest is Gruvsessionz which will take place the second Friday of every month from here on out at Heavens Nightclub. This Friday is the debut of the new monthly which showcases not only resident and guest DJs Lee Jonas, Awggie, Richie Spoons, Pressha, and Goner but also the holographic art of Lazer Guided Visions artist Raja, fire performances by the Womanipuria Fire Troop, and experimental bellydance theatre by the Hands of Kali. All this action will be documented by professional photographers and journalists and of course, the Produkt dancers will be out in force, as smart and sassy as they are beautiful. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Gruvsessionz is free before 10PM, $5 until 11PM, and $7 until 2AM, and if you haven’t been to Heavens Nightclub in Pioneer Square, then you are missing out on one of the biggest and best dance floors in Seattle. Come and experience the encompassing experience that Produkt creates; immerse yourself in music, dance, art, fire, and best of all- a group of positive partyers who bring it on and hold it down. See you on the dance floor.

She washed your little toes before you knew what they even were, she made you eat broccoli and let you eat ice cream, she listened to you cry and laugh, and she is your biggest fan. Or maybe all she did was give birth to you- but that’s kind of enough, don’t ya think? May 11 is Mother’s Day and you better not forget it or in the doghouse you will be. In fact, start making plans NOW, because a whole lot of people in Seattle have mothers.

What to do to please Mom? Well, it’s easy really, mothers are women, and women are easy to figure out, contrary to popular belief: we like good food, we like being entertained, we like sparkley things, and we like chocolate. But don’t just go out and buy some junk carnations from QFC along with a bottle of sauvignon blanc- no doubt she would love these things, but they are only things, which makes them lame. Why not take your mother out to enjoy life and give her a Mother’s Day to remember? Here are some great places to take your mom, and unlike a bouquet, the memories will live inside of her forever:

FOR ANIMAL LOVING MOMS: Mother’s Day Brunch at the Woodland Park Zoo: Moms love animals, otherwise they never would have had them in the first place, right? Hee hee hee. Really though; brunch and mothers go together like monkeys and inappropriate behavior, and there’s a dessert buffet! Win-win!

FOR ARTSY MOMS: If your mom is artsy, there’s a good chance you are an artist too, so the fact that Moms and Museums at the Bellevue Art Museum is letting in mothers for free on Mother’s Day (as long as she’s with you) should suit you just fine. Enjoy the paintings, and don’t worry honey- she recognizes your talent, whether the world does or not.

FOR OUTDOORSY MOMS: Have a Catered Breakfast at the Northwest Trek Wildlife Park then take a tram ride around the park and see if you can spot any bighorn sheep, deer, elk, or caribou out roaming free just like their mothers would have wanted.

FOR DRAMATIC MOMS: Well okay ALL moms are all a little dramatic but if yours loves the theatre, head to Intiman for the Mother’s Day Brunch followed by an afternoon matinee of The Diary of Anne Frank

FOR SPORTY MOMS: The Seattle Storm takes on the Indiana Fever at Key Arena Saturday night; root for the hard-core chicks with your hard-core mom.

FOR GAMBLING MOMS: The Emerald Queen Casino is giving away flowers, cash money money!, and matching handbags, along with hosting special games to see who knows their mother the best during the Mother’s Day “Two-Lips” Celebration. No comment on that name.

FOR FUNNY MOMS: Two hilarious female comedians are in town Mother’s Day weekend; Margaret Cho splits sides at The Paramount and Janeane Garofalo hams it up at the Showbox at the Market.

FOR FEMINIST MOMS: Buy tix to the NARAL Pro-Choice Luncheon at the Sheraton Hotel, and listen to the Sarah Weddington speak; she’s the attorney who successfully argued Roe vs. Wade in front of the Supreme Court.

FOR GARDENING MOMS: Flowers smell nice and are colorful and pretty, just like your mother. Take her to the Bellevue Botanical Garden for the Mother’s Day Social and follow it up with a tour of the extensive garden grounds.

FOR HIPPIE MOMS: Does your mom braid her long hair and smell like sweet patchouli? Remind her of her tripped-out days of psychedelia at the Cirque du Soleil’s CORTEO over in Marymoor Park. You’ll score major points- there’s not a mother alive who wouldn’t love this show.

FOR BAD MOMS: Did your mom drop you on your head repeatedly? Leave you with strangers for most of your childhood? Refuse to feed and clothe and shelter you as a toddler? Well then bring her to the punkerslut NOFX show at the Showbox SoDo. and make sure she ties those combat boots tight! Or how about a surprise guest slot at Open Mic Night at the Comedy Underground- you’re up, mom! After her set, take your mother for a swing around the dance floor at Country and Western Line Dancing Night at The Cuff Complex, Seattle’s hotter-than-the-sun dance club for gay men. Now that will be a Mother’s Day to remember- unlike your birthday, which she always forgot.

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY TO ALL OF YOU LIFE-GIVERS OUT THERE!

That’s right, the killer collection of Roman art from the most famous art museum EVER, the Louvre in Paris, is on display at the Seattle Art Museum until May 11- then it is gone forever, just like the Roman empire!

You have a few cool opportunities to see the Roman Art from the Louvre this side of Paris:

• Seattle Art Walk takes place every first Thursday (May 1) and the Seattle Art Museum is always free on this day. Free art for humans!
• Marathons may have originated in Greece but this weekend the Seattle Art Museum hosts a marathon art event: the SAM will be open from 10AM on Saturday, May 10 all the way to 9PM on Sunday, May 11. Art at 4AM takes on a whole new meaning- try it out.

Why would you want to see this exhibit? Because Cultures Collide at the Seattle Art Museum:

The opening night of Cirque du Soleil’s Corteo found me in the twelfth row of Le Grand Chapiteau, a frozen monkey with mouth agape, sitting in a stilled silence except for occasional bursts of laughter and sighs of amazement. Now I am not the silent and still type, AT ALL, and it takes a big experience like the Big Top to render me so. My heart however was pounding like a giant psychedelic clown was attacking a tympani with a rubber chicken, only stopping it’s mad march for moments of absolute antici……….pation as I waited in a trance-like state to see what the superhumans on stage might do next. Would they spin in a hoop like a living metallic-blue Vitruvian man simultaneously with five friends? Grab onto a chandelier and swing up into the sky in their skiivies? Slowly walk a mile-high tightrope, upside down? Float out over the audience for the most graceful crowd-surfing experience Seattle has ever seen? Join a languid parade of playful angels, Tuba players, and ballet dancers from the most bizarre dream EVER?

Physical and dramatic performing artists who are the very best in the world create the incredible spectacle that is the Cirque du Soleil; it is an acrobatic, gymnastic, dancing, theatrical, musical, comedic, sparkling, magical, childlike parade of sensory enlightenment, an epic French feast of ‘Wow!”, a near out-of-body celebration of the absurd and the beautiful. The amazingly talented and no doubt insanely hard-working athletes make every tumble and turn seem effortless and just an extension of their humanity, like you and I might tomorrow flip backwards from bed to bed in a pillow fight out of childhood fantasy.

Corteo is the show now playing at Marymoor Park in Redmond under a fat yellow and blue striped Grand Chapiteau or Big Top that has seemingly sprung from the colorful mind of a five year-old, a mind that we all once had. The character Corteo is a ghost-clown reliving his better years, and while he revisits his childhood antics and purity of perception, you follow along with him, just as entranced as he is by the once-lived escapades.

I absolutely cannot believe I that had never been to the Cirque du Soleil before. Why didn’t anyone ever shake me and give me a swift kick to the rear and say GET THEE TO THE CIRQUE DU SOLEIL? In a land where the likes of Avril Lavigne and Britney Spears qualify as ‘performing artists,’ the insatiable American consumers of entertainment dismiss terms like ‘eye-popping’ and ‘jaw-dropping’ because we have heard them describe everything from new flavors of yogurt to random celebutante #9’s fashion choice for the afternoon.

So let me shake you and light a fire under you, because at the Cirque du Soleil your eyes WILL pop, your jaw WILL drop, and your heart WILL pound, certain that either your senses are deceiving you OR that someone’s about to bite it, bigtime. The Cirque du Soleil is a thrilling and unique entertainment experience that can never truly be described, only lived.

So live it! Here are a few tips for making the trip to Redmond’s lovely Marymoor Park a bit easier:

• Allow PLENTY of time to get to your seat; traffic gets backed up and you will want a few extra minutes for buying balloons and cotton candy and running around the big top screaming and jumping…well, for hitting the gift shop, anyway.
• Parking is $15 payable in cash and cannot be avoided unless you hike in like a creature from Lake Washington lagoon.
• Take your mom! She will just LOVE it, you know she will, and Mother’s Day IS coming up, you know.
• Get a sneak peek of the action right here, and read Cedric’s take on the Cirque du Soleil.

CONSIDER YOUR FIRE LIT.

Last night around 6:15 PM across from Neumo’s was a long line of Seattle women: pretty, professional, heel-wearing, yabba-yabba gabbing women, waiting in the rain to get into the monthly event by Girl Power Hour. April’s installment was at The Sole Repair Shop and the theme was Girl Power Hour Goes Green; the ladies were lining up not only to network with other similar creatures but to learn new ways of living sustainably and creating and environmentally conscious world.

The night was very multi-faceted, a perfect match for the attendees who no doubt know a thing or two about doing multiple things at once. I talked to women from many different professional arenas: artists, relationship counselors, lawyers, businesswomen, models, and more. The turnout was great, it was almost a stretch to create floorspace for the sustainable fashion show by The Finerie. The women really responded to the chi-chi eco-chique that filled the floor with purple silk dresses and other sustainable fabrics (overheard: “Silk is sustainable? YES!”). Local nibbles, chocolates from Theo Chocolate, and organic donuts from Mighty O were also a hit, as well as the lavender and kumquat cocktails made from Square One Organic Vodka. All through the night Seattle’s first “Green Deejay” Tecumseh of Bamboo Beats played easy salsa rhythms, henna tattoos were created, and tips on how to conserve energy were projected up onto the wall.

The theme was green but the focus of the night, and of Girl Power Hour, is networking for cool women; getting like-minded chicks together to meet and make alliances, to promote each other in a man’s world (and yes, it still is, in case you were wondering). For this Girl Power Hour founders Darnell Sue and Samantha Lawton deserve major props; they are trying to create a New Girls Club to promote females in the way that the Old Boys Club does for the fellows. Women and networking go together like, well, women and networking: we LOVE to talk, and we are good at it. Girl Power Hour attempts to harness this female talent into more than yakking about celebrities’ fashion choices or what-he-said; in fact the women of Seattle can talk ourselves to a world where women help each other out and up, cocktail in hand and confidence in our smiles.

Next month’s Girls Go Green event takes place May 15 at Belltown’s See Sound Lounge and supports The American Heart Association’s Go Red for Women Movement: expect lots of red dresses, pole dancing by D’Vine Movement, and beats from a very talented (and very lucky) DJ Jeromy Nail. More monthly cocktail schmoozes are in the works; check out the Girl Power Hour website for more details, to R.S.V.P. for events, sign up for newsletters, and find out how you can get involved with this dynamic group of women.