CultureMob.com likes to cover unusual events like pillow fights and power tool races, so how about a fashion show that promises to plunge into the world of Seattle fashion, oxymoron which that might be?

The Fashion Group International and Seattle Pacific University’s Fashion Group have joined together for Gas Masks, Stilettos, and Designer Jeans: A Story of Fashion and Our Lives. This fundraising event, taking place Saturday May 31 at 6PM, will take a look at the role that fashion plays in each of our lives along with music, food, shopping, and raffle prizes. Culturally determined and identity confirming, the clothes we wear are much more than the sum of their threads. 

Gas Masks, Stilettos, and Designer Jeans will illuminate the role that fashion plays in our lives through four themes: fashion as military power and oppression, fashion as environment, fashion as religion, and fashion as social justice. Put on by a zealous group of student fashionistas, this event will surely raise more questions than it answers- but questions are more fun anyway, right?

I have never owned a pair of designer jeans and the only gas mask experience I’ve had was certainly not of the chemical warfare variety, but I am guilty (as my feet attest) of subjecting myself to the torture device that are stilettos. I am not sure how exactly fashion can be social justice- but this is exactly why I should hit up this event, held at Seattle Pacific University.

Find out all the information about Gas Masks, Stilettos, and Designer Jeans here.

Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte, and Samantha strut onto big screens this Friday not just in New York City but in metropoli all over the country. All of you Sex and the City fans know that the fifth character in the HBO series was not Aidan or Stanford or Steve or even Mr. Big- no, that most important player was the Big Apple itself. There is no sex without The City.

Or is there? What if you took away the character of Manhattan and replaced it with, say, Seattle? Would the show have been so different? Pour yourself a cosmopolitan (or better yet, have your man-toy do it) and relax into the world of Sex and the City: Seattle Style:

• Miranda is a lawyer for Boeing who lives in Belltown and regularly bitches to the city about the crackheads and prostitutes on her street. Luckily for Miss Smarty-Pants there are plenty of well-read men with frayed library cards in this town to keep up with her in conversation- though no one on earth can match her knifelike wit, propelled by the fine forces of cynicism and sarcasm. Miranda’s favorite club? The see-and-be-seen venue of conspicuous consumption Club Venom, of course.
• Charlotte arranges exhibits at the Seattle Art Museum and does charity work for singles’ group Space City Mixer, a group who she considers in need of charity indeed. This unapologetic yuppie lives on uppity Mercer Island and spends her evenings online ordering designer clothes and hanging out with metrosexuals at The Last Supper Club in Pioneer Square.
• Samantha handles PR for Microsoft, giving her plenty of opportunities to play with rich men. Though she works in Redmond, she would never live in a place as sterile and un-hip as the Eastside and instead has purchased a new and fancy condo in the grittiest, most interesting neighborhood in Seattle: Capitol Hill. Samantha fits in well with the flavor and color of the quarter and gives as good as she gets with the street kids, buskers, and bums. She relaxes with her favorite bunch of people at The Cuff Complex.
• Carrie writes a sex column for the Seattle Weekly which is giving Savage Love a run for its money for the naughtiest, dirtiest, and best love and sex column in the country; ‘Date Girl” now writes for a more appropriate publication, Teen Magazine. Carrie lives in Fremont and shops at all the annoying chi-chi boutiques, somehow buying $200 teeshirts and $500 purses on a writer’s salary. She hangs out where all the hot guys in Fremont are: the Nectar Lounge, of course.

The four women meet for Sunday brunch at Julia’s in Wallingford, wearing not Manolo Blahniks but Tevas with rolled-up jeans (acceptable fashion in the rainy city- admit it, you’ve done it); drinking double espressos and diving into plates of Eggs Benedict (they don’t have to starve themselves quite so much outside of NYC).

For a long weekend the girls vacation not in the Hamptons but in Hawaii, which is the closest and most accessible beach to Seattle (and by most accessible I mean you can actually swim in the water, not that our four heroines would dream of doing so). There is no strolling with beaus in Central Park for Carrie, only walking around Green Lake- and she’d better walk, not meander, or the rollerbladers/runners/multi-tasking women jogging with a double stroller and two large dogs while talking on the phone will run her ass over.

So who do these alpha-women date? It’s a little harder in the Emerald City where most men hale from the Land of Passive-Aggressiva; there are no eager stockbrokers here, no modelizers, no models, and no tycoons of any sort, save the software brains and Boeing boys. Our girls are left with:

Mr. Bike-to-Work Guy: With skin-tight duds and shaved legs, he often gets asked the question, “Do you really need an all-spandex outfit to ride from Wallingford to Queen Anne?” The answer is always NO, people, and Miranda lets him know it, before rolling her eyes and moving on.
The Outdoorsman: Bad news for Carrie and her hatred of squirrels which are “just rats in cuter outfits,” because all over Seattle you find this R.E.I. gear-wearing, head-to-Tiger-Mountain-after-work, long weekend on the Peninsula, boat-loving guy who rarely brushes his hair, and despite herself, Carrie can’t get enough. Hope she has waterproof gear for the spring nights spent in the Cascades.
The Rocker: Found all over the streets of Seattle, the musician is passionate, a little dirty, preoccupied with his band but prone to grand romantic gestures. Charlotte is a goner for this type, until she realizes he has gestured romantically for half the females in the city.
Mr. No-Balls: He epitomizes the saying, “He’s just not that into you,” because he’s just not into anything- living is a bit risky, after all. He is eaten alive by Samantha before he opens his mouth. One lost, 200,000 to go. Good thing she is hungry.
The DJ: A species almost as numerous as The Rocker in Seattle, the spin-master lives the conundrum which Carrie must use all of her journalistic training and wicked flirting skills to figure out: all the DJs are man-whores, yet all the DJs have girlfriends. Carrie susses the mystery out, and the answer is not pretty.
The Hipster: Recognizable by his tight black jeans, chunky silver jewelry, perfectly beaten-up skate shoes and hair mussed just so over the right eye, the hipster is too cool to care about anything really, except himself. Is it possible that the hipster is just an emo who is too old to be an emo anymore? Discuss amongst yourselves, at brunch.

So there you have it; Sex in the City Seattle Style is a little bit the same, and a whole lot different. To really understand the women we must walk a block in their Choos; don’t miss the movie Sex and the City, opening all over the area on Friday, and on Thursday at midnight at select venues like the Regal Meridian 16 in downtown Seattle, Lincoln Square Cinema in Bellevue, and AMC Loews Alderwood Mall 16 up north.

Will the movie be any good? Abso-F*cking-Lutely.

Read my review of Sex and the City the Movie here.

The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian, the second movie from C.S. Lewis’ Narnia trilogy opened Friday the 16th of May, nationwide.  If you are in downtown Seattle you can catch it at Regal Meridian 16. 

What is it? Four siblings, two brothers and two sisters are magically transported from the London Underground (during World War II) to the fantastical realm of Narnia - where they had previously lived alternate lives as Kings and Queens (the subject matter of the first movie), and they are called upon to once again save the day and the land.  You do not need to have seen the first movie for the second movie to make sense.

At its BEST (7.5): Its a fairy tale of good and evil, talking woodland creatures, mythical beasts, magic, evil tyrants and marauding armies of knights and catapults (or, more accurately trebuchets).  The story is simple yet entertaining, and the effects, costumes and scenery are lavish and wondrous.  The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian is not too complicated or dark, making it a great movie for kids.

At its WORST (5.5): It never really reaches any sort of crescendo; it plods along and even drags at times.  There is almost no character development at all and it tries very hard to stay away from the fact that this is a sequel - meaning the characters can, and probably should, be built upon.  There is just an obvious lack of real excitement, tension or energy in this movie.  It does look nice, but if you are over the age of 12, it may fail completely to interest you.

Others like it: Chronicles of Narnia, Lord of the Rings (much better than Narnia), Willow, Spiderwick Chronicles

Who’s in it? Other than the voices of Eddie Izzard (The Riches (TV), My Super Ex-Girlfriend, Ocean’s 13) and Liam Neeson (Star Wars: Episode I, Rob Roy, Kinsey), the stars (the four kids and Prince Caspian) are relative unknowns.

Who Directed it? Andrew Adamson (Shrek, Shrek 2, Chronicles of Narnia) also wrote the screenplay for this and the first Narnia film. 

How Long is it? 140 minutes

Phil’s Thoughts: Even though the film looks really nice and it has 2 hours and 20 minutes to tell its story, it lacked depth and detail.  I was only moderately entertained, and I never got excited.  The bad guy wasn’t that bad, the evil army was never really threatening, and the battle was anticlimactic. There wasn’t enough plot or character development for me, at all.  In the end, The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian just lacked “oomph!” and really dragged as well in several places.  However, I think for a family (specifially the kids) it is a really good choice of late spring movie.

I’m telling you, SEAllective at Lo-Fi was a great vibe last night. Every city has a place where the atmosphere is so cool, you can’t help but tell the world about it. Lo-Fi is the type of place you’ll want to bring your savvy friends who happen to be visiting from New York to. Then you can tell them “Seattle knows how to get down.”

I wrote a review of the performance (Fred Roth) here at http://culturemob.com/events/5579896

Outside of the great music, one of the coolest things I did last night was try the Lo-Fi’s own Sake Jello shot in a glass.

Wanna know something? It was really good! It was the right combination of Sake and Jello. Compliments to the owner. Nice touch!

Pictured here (from l-r) is Darrius Willrich, Donyea Goodman and Thaddeus Turner.

Three of the seven musicians that turned the heat up on the second set last night. I really dig what they got going on at the Lo-Fi these days. I love live music in Seattle!

For more events at Lo-Fi go to culturemob.com

My favorite bar in Seattle is closing down, and I am heartbroken. I think I need a drink.

For months now I have heard rumor after rumor of the Seamonster Lounge’s inevitable demise; I knew it was only a matter of time as the location has been for sale since last year. I followed each declaration of the bar’s closure that I heard with a slow roll down 45th in Wallingford to ascertain that the bar was indeed still open. Alas, it is now confirmed: the best bar in Seattle is closing. When the Seamonster ends its run at the end of May to be converted into a restaurant, the neighborhood will have lost something special. Where will we go now? The belongs-in-Belltown overt fake chi-chiness that is Babalu? Goldies, frat-boy heaven of a sports bar complete with trivia night and video gambling? Murphy’s Irish Pub, a lame hangout which I’ve been in three times but for some reason can only remember the screaming? The Pelican, wicker palace of fried food whose decor was inspired by your crazy grandmother’s back porch?

No, nothing can replace the Seamonster. We loved it. 

I will miss the Seamonster terribly, and not for the elongated, fair-skinned mermaid swimming along the wall or her bright red hair swirling around next to her. Not because of the cushy make-out swing in the back of the bar or the strands of blue and green Christmas lights that provided all the atmosphere the small spot needed or wanted. I am not crying in my beer because of the tiny dance floor where I smacked more than one bass guitarist with my flailing arms, or because of tassle-tinged Tuesday burlesque nights where the best part was not the T & A but the look of pleasant surprise on the faces of strangers who had just walked in to see a girl wearing a gold fan and high heels. It isn’t because of the smell of Dick’s hamburgers wafting up the street as you bummed a smoke outside, the benches on either side of the front door, or the proximity of the Seamonster to my home, a.k.a: stumbling distance. It isn’t because of the little fake fireplace with orange and red tinsel inside the door which somehow always felt warm, or the strong drinks I rarely paid for, or Purple Friday and the strains of Strawberry Beret filling the whole dark space. I am not distressed because my girl gang, The Crimson Rose, no longer has a home base for our shady activities which include dressing up in pink vinyl pants and dancing like maniacs; I am not distraught because I will miss the intimate live music performance space where I got to jam to the Boogielistics, the Drunken Masters, the Nepotistas, Haiku-Chi, and so many more skillful local musicians.

No, the reason that the Seamonster was so special and that many will will mourn it’s passage is simple and singular: Andrew.

Andrew is the owner, the manager, the bartender, the late-night talker, a funny guy and party boy, hat-wearer and giver of many-a free tequila shot, damn good-looking and the talented funkadelic singer who is leaving behind the glamorous life of the Seamonster Lounge to pursue his musical future with his band, Haiku-Chi. Andrew is the spirit of the Seamonster, the creator and purveyor of the good vibes that brought wanderers in off the street and had them coming back again and again.

Energy cannot be destroyed, however, and the party will follow Andrew and Haiku-Chi as they continue funking up the Seattle soul scene and spreading the love. Visit CultureMob.com for information on Haiku-Chi’s upcoming performances, and stop by the Seamonster before the end of May to pay your respects to Andrew and the best bar in Seattle and have a drink. And as Andrew would say, “Cheers, bitches.”

Cheers, indeed, and R.I.P. Seamonster. This is what it sounds like when doves cry.

GUEST BLOGGER: PT

Speed Racer at the Boeing IMAX theatre and Pacific Place

What Is it? A boy (Speed Racer) who was born to race cars and go fast battles the forces of the evil corporate sponsors. Based on the 1967 Japanese Anime series - brought back in the 1990s.

How long is it? 135 minutes

At its Best: (9.5) Outstanding filmmaking, exciting action, over-the-top visual effects, brilliant colors (a truly one-of-a-kind visual experience), the best of what Speed Racer ever was, amplified for the big screen.  An amazing production that really is unlike anything you have ever seen.  It is campy without being ridiculous and it’s comic-booky without being too dumb.  The acting is impressive considering the type of movie this is, and the story is tight.  It has drama as well as action; solid character development and some good comic relief. Very enjoyable, without any holes.

At its Worst: (6) Speed Racer drags in some places and is very long - seemingly much longer than the 2hr 15min it is.  The driving sequences are fun, but they could have been more interesting and start to feel a little repetitive by the end.  The attempts at comic relief are too campy and too stupid to be truly funny and end up falling a little flat.  The character development is misplaced and takes away from the comic-book feeling of this film. Also, if you sit too close, it could give you a headache.  All in all, fun, but not great.

Who made it? Written and Directed by the very talented Wachowski Brothers (Larry and Andy; and apparently, not brother and sister as many rumors might have you believe), who are also responsible for the Matrix Trilogy and V for Vendetta. 

Who’s in it? Emile Hirsch (Into the Wild and the Girl Next Door), Christina Ricci (Black Snake Moan, Sleepy Hollow), Matthew Fox (Lost, We are Marshall), John Goodman (Roseanne, The Big Lebowski), adn Susan Sarandon (Thelma and Louise, Bull Durham).

What’s like it? Tron (the colors, the action, the campiness), Dick Tracy (the cartoon color scheme and the characters).

What did Phil think: Well…glad you asked.  I loved Speed Racer.  Absolutely and completely.  I think that the Wachowski brothers are incredibly talented filmmakers who take great pains to fuss over the details and keep their movies very tight.  The look and feel of this film is unique and quite stunning.  The acting was solid at all times, and there is always a danger in a film like this that the acting and story are merely incidental to the action and the effects - not so in this case.  It completely worked for me.  I did see this movie with two others who (1) liked it and (2) liked it a lot.  Neither of my fellow movie goers liked it as much as I did, but they were both entertained; and, there was agreement that seeing it at the IMAX theatre was a great move. 

Free tickets! Free tickets! Free tickets!

DJ ?UESTLOVE! DJ ?UESTLOVE! DJ ?UESTLOVE!

CultureMob.com is giving away 70 tickets to the party: CultureMob.com presents THE ROOTS New Album “Rising Down” Listening Party hosted by BLACK THOUGHT and featuring DJ ?UESTLOVE with special guests. It all goes down at Neumos on Capitol Hill Thursday June 5.

CLICK HERE to go to contest entry page.

?uestlove is a gifted producer and an incredibly skilled jazz drummer, best known for his work behind the drum kit for The Roots. He has worked with a myriad of very talented musicians and artists including D’Angelo, Al Green, Zack De La Rocha, Fiona Apple, Erykah Badu, Joss Stone, John Mayer, Common, Eminem, Justin Timberlake, Dave Chapelle, Christina Aguilera and Jay-Z. June 5th he will be laying down fat tracks in his DJ shoes and you can expect a mix of classic hip-hop, funk, soul, and rock; the dance friendly beats will have Neumos poppin’ hot all evening long.

Winners will be selected at random and notified by email on May 30; non-winners can buy tickets at the door or in advance through Ticketswest for $15 (available soon). Doors open at 8PM and sorry toddlers, this one is 21+ only. The Culture Mobsters will be out in force, promoting our awesome website, spreading the good word about the Seattle arts scene, and most of all: enjoying life. Hey, we practice what we preach!

Don’t miss the party! ENTER TO WIN today.

I wish I could write a review of Atmosphere’s performance at the Showbox SoDo last night, but I can’t. I never saw the show, because I was thrown out due to a case of mistaken identity. For real.

Let me ’splain:

I had been trying to get a ticket to the sold-out show for about a week and a half, with no luck. Then the night before a friend texted me that he had an extra ticket to Atmosphere, and did I want to go? My reply was two words, and the second one was ‘YES’. I had never seen Atmosphere before and was excited as I had heard great things about their live shows, and I love the Showbox SoDo’s warehousey feel.

The crowd out on the warm Tuesday evening for the much-hailed hip-hop duo from Minnesota was dense and all-ages, with a bit more mad-dogging and less open smiles than I am used to in my usual electronic music crowd. If you like rap though, last night the Showbox SoDo was the place to be, and I was stoked to be swirling around in the mix.

Arriving late, of course, I had missed the first act and Abstract Rude was up on stage laying down rhymes and steadily working up the crowd in front of a big banner proclaiming, “When life gives you lemons, you paint Seattle gold.” 

I watched all this with my friends and our beers, caged off like the animals we are in the drinker’s section. When Abstract Rude finished up we all headed outside to check out one of my friend’s new pimp van, actually, the pimpest van EVER in the history of the universe and sweetest ride you ever saw, with running lights, a drink table and DOUBLE privacy shades. Straight pimp, straight up and down, like six o’clock.

After the fresh air/smoke break we headed back inside; Atmosphere was about to go on! Stamps on the wrists we walked up to the entrance, but the bouncer took one look at me, flashlight to the face, and would not let me pass. Whaaaaa? I held back, my friends went on in, then I tried again and he still wouldn’t let me in. I thought he was just being a jerk so I went around to the other entrance, which unfortunately was already closed for the night. The ladies there directed me back to the bouncer, who still wouldn’t let me inside. He said I had started a fight earlier inside the club, kicked some girl’s face in, knocked over a bunch of tables, then ran out screaming F you! F you! F you! to the bouncers.

Uh, yeah. This was not me. I am a peace lover, which is exactly what I said to the bouncers. “I’m a peace lover! I’ve been outside hanging out with my friends!” They were not having it. 

“Well, it was some girl who looked just like you,” the bouncer admitted, though still not waivering in his duty to keep the crowd safe from short, blond, table-trashing maniacs. So apparently last night a 5′4″ girl in a blue tank top, black skirt, fluorescent yellow fishnets, black and white striped legwarmers and a giant fuzzy fake fur coat beat someone up at the Showbox SoDo, knocked over several tables and did not take names. And because of that, Shilo missed the show.

It would have been funny if it didn’t suck. My friends all assumed I had gotten back in to the packed club and was dancing up at the front- after all, why wouldn’t the Showbox Sodo have let me back in? I cabbed it home and was in bed by midnight. Now I am all about new experiences, and this was a certainly a new one for me, but when said experiences interfere with new music, I get a little ticked off.

So how was Atmosphere? One of oppressive security at the Showbox SoDo, of bouncers who must not score very high on the job-satisfaction list, of people who need to CHILL OUT. The energy at hip-hop performances is palpably different from that at other shows, fomented in large part by the security forces who prove the cliche true that if you are looking for trouble, you will find it. 

But last night they made a mistake. The Showbox SoDo kicked out a peaceful dancer, someone who calms down violent drunk guys outside of clubs, marches in anti-war protests, has a peace sign tatttooed on her forehead and happens to write for a Seattle entertainment website. Oops. I’m guessing the party in the van was the best of the night, anyway.

So if you are wondering how the performance really was, here’s a message I got this morning to whet your appetite: Honestly the show was kinda mediocre, definitely very rehearsedly-adlib-like. Tried to play it off that ‘just because you’re Seattle and you’re holding it down’ but it was pretty scripted… didn’t sound mixed very well either. Kinda mixed like they’re trying to impress you with loud more than feel or good sound. Anyway, um shit stop throwing tables and getting kicked out of places alright?”

So there’s your review; now I gotta go clean this blood off my knuckles. Just kidding- I think the Showbox SoDo owes me a show ticket AND cab fare. Anyone else out there actually see Atmosphere perform and want to add their two cents in?

If you are heading to the Nas show at the Showbox SoDo this Friday night, tread lightly- and watch out for those crazy table-throwing blond girls- they’re everywhere.

GUEST BLOGGER: RIK WRIGHT

If you’ve never noticed it, there’s a seldom recognized non-profit here in Seattle dedicated to more avant-garde forms of free and creative music, art and dance performances. Located in a non-descript building on 18th and Union, Gallery 1412 has occupied the space formerly housing the Polestar Music Gallery for several years now. 

This Wednesday, May 14th, the gallery will host performances of two exciting groupings of Northwest sonic co-conspirators led by James DeJoie and Chris Stover.

James DeJoie has been gracing the Pacific Northwest with his baritone and alto saxophone performances for many years now. A Seattle native, DeJoie’s saxophonics, along with his clarinet and flute prowess, have been part of innumerable Seattle jazz outfits including the Jazz Police, the Jim Cutler Orchestra, the Jim Knapp Orchestra and Zen Tornado. DeJoie revels in the practice of bringing together diverse musical genres in distinctive combinations, enlisting veteran bassist Walter White, drummer Randy Doak, and exceptional vibraphonist Evan Buehler together to play their original compositions. Along with our more “traditional” jazz sound, Joie Tet often incorporates multiple wind and percussive instruments enhanced by electronic sampling, effect pedals and spoken word.

Chris Stover’s More Zero plays an exciting mix of modern jazz, drum-n-bass, and funk all within the framework of Chris’s unique compositional style. Favorably compared to the Dave Holland Quintet and John Hollenbeck’s Claudia Quartet, More Zero features an eclectic mix of some truly world class improvising musicians: Stuart MacDonald on saxophone, Ben Thomas on vibes, Jeff Norwood on bass, and Matt Jorgensen on drums. 

For a mid-week taste of musical experimentation and noteworthy instrumental prowess, visit Gallery 1412 for More Zero and the James DeJoie Joie Tet and treat yourself to this fabulous combination of local inspirations.

Rik Wright
http://www.rikwright.com

GUEST BLOGGER: S.P. MISKOWSKI

In a perfect world, the good relationships we’ve lost would get a second chance. With grace, an engaging cast, and impressive technical expertise, Seattle director Lynn Shelton offers a vivid tale of friendship between two men who have every reason to grow apart in drama My Effortless Brilliance.

Novelist Eric Lambert Jones (Sean Nelson of local band Harvey Danger) decides to use his latest book tour as an excuse to drop in on estranged buddy Dylan (Basil Harris) who leads a rustic existence in a cabin in eastern Washington. They are joined for booze, late night conversation, and a shambling cougar hunt by Dylan’s friend Jim (Calvin Reeder), whose presence further demonstrates the gap that is widening between the two men.

The film is layered with carefully devised character histories, created by Shelton in discussion with the actors. Yet the dialog has been improvised within each scene. The result is a joyously fresh and moving story with the best of both worlds- a solid structure and playful, believable interactions. The silences between characters are given as much respect as their words. In the balance, there is a spoken and unspoken truth, a sense of both the inadequacy of speech and its necessity for human comfort.

Jeanette Maus completes the cast, with a charming comic turn as an enthusiastic book tour interviewer.

My Effortless Brilliance is a delightful reminder that we often like people for strange and subterranean reasons. We may not be able to justify them. We may have nothing in common. Yet when we meet–even after years–the conversation picks up mid-syllable. For better or worse, we understand one another. Where do we assign such friendships in our lives? 

Screening of My Effortless Brilliance at the Seattle International Film Festival takes place on Saturday, May 24th at 9:30PM and on Monday, May 26th at 4:00PM, at the Egyptian Theatre.